Christian Men and the Deception of Sexual Sin

I watched a well-known internet radio show where the hosts were discussing how to be sexually pure. They mentioned a book called "Every Man's Battle" that mentioned techniques like "bouncing the eyes" and quoted verses like Job 31:1 (from which an internet filter named Covenant Eyes is named). What I noticed in their conversation is that they were basically just throwing ideas out there. I realized they don't have any idea how to help someone who is in this sin and can't get out.

I was a part of a church at one time where we had a "men's meeting" to discuss important issues we as men face.  Basically it was a session to talk about things such as masturbation and pornography.  I learned that the leaders in my church were at least ocassionally engaging in one or the other or both.  By this time I had already repented of my sin and knew what the true way out of this sin was.  The problem was here I think that most of them were not interested in getting out of this sin.  They were content with the ocassional fall here and there and of "repenting" thereafter.  While this is better than the man who has worked this sin into his theology, it is still no excuse for it.

Why are there no few answers among most Christian leaders who are basically orthodox in their beliefs?  I would suggest that most of them are married and so they can do their fantasies with their wives.  I mean if you are looking at multiple women on the Internet or out on the street, can you really be thinking about your wife EVERY time you are intimate with her?  I mean come on.  You have to fantasize at least occasionally.  That is not an excuse for them.  They should not be fantasizing AT ALL.  They should have passion only for their wives but they don't.

I remember a man that went to seminary but unfortunately had not found a wife by the time he got out.  He told me that no church wanted anything to do with a man who was not married.  This is sad. But it also helps you to see why there is a little bit of a trick to the whole pornography problem amongst pastors.  Those who struggle the most are single people and they are in the pews.  Those who struggle, but also have an "outlet" for their lust kind of struggle quietly.  Eventually their marriages break up or they are caught with the secretary, but the problem is the same.  1 John 1:8 says that "if we say we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us."  The problem with the pastors is that if it came out what they were doing then they would loose their credibility.  They would loose all the things they have worked so hard for.

Those pastors who don't have any answers yet have a secret struggle with their sin need to repent. They need to realize that they may not even have a relationship with God at all.  They need to get down on their knees and confess their sin to God and to their wives and congregations.  Then they need to seek biblical help to fix the areas of pride and selfishness that have caused this problem in the beginning.  Then we will see restoration to the American church.